Sabtu, 16 September 2017

Motherhood and Single Blessedness

It is no longer taboo in the society that there are mothers who chose or who are forced to remain single despite of having a child. There are already a considerable percentage of single mothers in the overall human population worldwide. And gradually, the society is embracing these women as new breeds of liberated individuals, taking part of existence in this world.

Motherhood is a way of life that women choose or are destined to take in the later part of their lives. But then again, due to morality issues, we cannot solely pertain to Motherhood as a phase of life expected only at the latter part of their existence. There are of course women who got pregnant at an early age, and have assumed Motherhood from then on. Either way, mothers are still mothers. Whatever it is that is missing in their lives, such as a husband and a father to their children, it doesn't make they any lesser of a person. It even heightens their courage and strength as women who dared morality and social standards of doing without a husband to put up with for the rest of their lives. A woman is just equally competent to become a father and a mother to her children, and sometimes can provide even more than with a man in the family.

But what have made these women welcome single blessedness in their lives?

Motherhood is hard as it is. And having to wake up every day of their lives with a man that cannot fulfill his responsibilities for the family is extremely torturous for them, than living it all as a single mother. Women are starting to fill in the gaps in the society by taking over significant roles and positions that men couldn't have done any better. Thus, the present discriminatory movements against women are of low regards already because all of it is ultimately disregarded by the women's strong will of assuming even the hardest of all tasks, which is motherhood.

And so, it is only right for the society to accept the presence and the situation of single mothers. There is no reason at all that can validate or legalize condemning or limiting the rights of women who are able to go on with life as a single mother. The people must not forget that among those single mothers come most of the intelligent and socially active persons in the world that has made great changes in the flow of history such as Bill Clinton and Barack Obama. And so we must say, never judge a single mother because in their hands did the people grew that can change the face of the earth. And so they did along with many other people around the world.

Kamis, 31 Agustus 2017

Balancing Work and Motherhood - Helpful Tips For Mompreneurs

Many of us are entrepreneurial moms (mompreneurs,) myself included. If we work away from home we feel like we should be home with our kids and then once we're home with our kids we feel like we should be working. If we work from home we constantly see around us what needs to be done for household chores. There's no one tactic or strategy that will work all of us when it comes to balancing work and motherhood, but there are many women that have found a way to do it that suits their lifestyle. Here are some tips when it comes to being a mompreneur and feeling we are where we should be all the time.

Efficiency: One thing that I have found when it comes to balancing work and motherhood, that especially applies for the work at home mompreneur, is establishing when you can be most productive at specific tasks. You will be more efficient this way. Work on tasks that require the most attention and focus while children are napping or having quiet time and tasks that require less dedication that have room for distraction without having to fully refocus when they are up. Get help from your partner when you need to meet deadlines or goals and be appreciative of his help. Don't forget to take care of yourself, you can't be efficient if you are overloading and neglecting yourself. There really are only 24 hrs in a day. If your schedule allows, consider setting aside one day a week to be a day where you focus on family instead of work to help ensure quality time.

Day Planner: When it comes to balancing work and motherhood, using a day planner will help us mompreneurs stay on top of our daily schedules in priority sequence and enable us to know how to better prepare for the day ahead. Combine work and family schedule to ensure no double booking. Establish your goals and how much you want or need to get done in a certain time period and break down the tasks within 'x' amount of days. Another way to feel well prepared for the day ahead is to do a few things the night before to help your day start off smoothly. For example tidying up your office space, prepare lunches, or setting the coffee pot. You can also get up before your family does to take some quiet time for yourself or get some extra work done.

Don't Be Too Hard On Yourself: There is only so many hours in a day available to get things done. Balancing work and motherhood and feeling efficient at both can be a challenge for the mompreneur. Chances are you won't complete absolutely everything you could in a day, but prioritizing by importance and priority then performing work and tasks when you can be most efficient at them will help you feel productive about the efforts you are putting in. Don't be unrealistic with your home duties when balancing work and motherhood. You don't have to be a suzy homemaker to be a good mom. By working for your family you are providing in other areas. Don't feel guilty if you don't make school costumes by hand or do school baking from scratch. Realize you are only one person and are doing the best that you can with the time given.


Rabu, 16 Agustus 2017

Motherhood - Find the Fun in It!

At 36 years old I fell pregnant and that was when my whole life changed. I went from being a successful computer applications specialist , party and dancing girl, to a full time wife, mother, task master, shopper, health nut, trainer, household manager, business owner, cook and baker, just to name a few. Basically, it was motherhood and mothering, and to me, it was tough.

Although happy about my new little one, and determined to be the best mom ever, by the time the first year had passed I felt like I had aged 25 years. Although busy as heck, I was also bored, fatigued, fed up, it seemed like I was never having any fun. I missed the nights of dancing, partying, staying out late and never having to worry about responsibilities at home. I missed the little freedoms that people without kids take for granted - but most of all, I missed myself and who I used to be. The idea that I was responsible for a little life made me stressed out and often times depressed at the thought of doing it all wrong. Nevertheless, I wanted to find a way to laugh everyday like I used to when out with my friends and dancing, as apposed to being a constant task master and constantly advising what to do and what not to do and how to do this or that.

One day, while chatting to a friend, who seemed to have it all together, I got such a shock when she said to me, "I love my kids, but there has to be more to my life then this or I am going to lose my head!" She and I both agreed that the days for us lacked fun and excitement and although we were proud of our developed motherhood skills, and proud of the job we were doing, all the more reason we deserved to have some fun in the midst of everyday mothering.

Then it occurred to me that although grown up fun doesn't usually mix with kiddie fun, I could still find ways of putting a little craziness into the day that would leave lasting memories for the family, make me laugh, and above all else, feel alive.

Here are some of the crazy, fun, out of the ordinary things I have done with my kids to add laughter, smiles, and memories, and have given me a sense of fun ever day.  They also make for great stories to tell friends and family and have added value and life to my journey as a mom.

1. Feeling tired and just want to put your feet up for 5 minutes? How about doing it at the beauty salon? Give your child a brush, hair clips and a mirror and let them do your hair. Most kids love this and it also gives mom a chance to put her feet up and relax for a while.

2. Need your child to relax, not be so hyper and chatty? Give them a baby massage. This massage benefits child and parent. Follow the massage with a cup of herbal baby tea and honey. This also offers your child health benefits and for mom it offers a quiet, calm household for at least a little while. You will love it when afterward your child cuddles close to you and you can smell the essence of the massage oil you used and the atmosphere in the house.

3. At the end of year, take a family photo and choose a theme. Everyone has to dress up to match the theme. Have one nice photo taken and one silly one. Each year when you hang the new photos, you and you kids can laugh and remember things that took place when you took the previous picture.  A useful accessory to motherhood is the ability to take captivating, skillful pictures.

4. Want your hubby to know just how hard your job of mothering is? Switch roles! You are sure to come out of it with a big prize when he sees what you have to deal with and how gracefully you do it everyday. Take photographs of him and his facial expressions while he is struggling through the simplest things, or when the kids throw food on him, or when he looks like he can't stand for another minute. When he puts the kids to bed, take one last photo of him. Print the photos and put them in a special book to show your kids and share with friends - trust me, it's a real laugh!

5. Barney, Tweeney's, cartoons? - Blah! Turn your kids on to Bob Marley, Black Eye Peas and Gwen Stefani. Let them move and groove to the music. Give each one a present for doing a dance show for you. Take pictures for you and the kids to laugh at later. You will marvel at your mothering when you see how not only adorable they are but how their little bodies are so uncoordinated and how they move so adorably. You will have a smile on your face for hours and your child is sure to come up with a funny dance move that you can imitate and make them laugh. Not to mention this is great exercise for the kids.

6. Go the movies - no baby sitter necessary! Take your baby to the movies. (Infants love the dark, and loud trailers make them snooze immediately.) Munch on your goodies in peace and enjoy the flick - without the fifty million interruptions!

7. Let them help you escape. Let your kids be the excuse to do the things you want to do, like hopping out for a manicure or pedicure, having an unusually junky meal for dinner, or going to an amusement park. Use your kids as an excuse for not doing things you don't want to do or don't feel like doing. Believe me, there are perks to motherhood and you deserve to use them!

8. Every Mother's Day, have a picture taken with your kids. Store the pictures and the keep sakes from your kids in a nice box (let your kids decorate it and gain some time for yourself in the process). Every year visit the box and see how much your kids have grown and how much their crafts, coloring, writing, and drawing skills have improved.

9. Give your kids quiet time every day. Teach your kids to play independently with books, crayons, blocks, and music. These are just a few healthy ideas. When your children learn to play on their own in frees mom up to get tasks done in a reasonable amount of time, without all the interruptions. It also gives mom an opportunity to have a chat with a friend on the phone, which I am sure you will all agree would be a nice piece of grown up time. It is also very beneficial for your kids.

10. PJ Day is one of my favorites! The kids, well, lets just say they wish everyday was PJ day. Mom and kids hang out in their PJ's all day. Matching PJ's are extra fun! Eat your favorite foods and watch your favorite movies. Kids can watch their movies on a laptop while mom watches hers on the TV. Lay out drinks and snacks so they won't disturb you for these things.

11. Star Gaze the night away. Tent up in your backyard with a radio, s'mores and other great camp out food and drink. Use it as your reading room or to star gaze. Kids can star gaze and play while mom reads in the tent.

12. Do you have a house fairy? No! Well, you had better put one in place as soon as possible. Invent a house fairy, give her a cool name and tell the kids she is always watching them and keeping track of all their good deeds and naughty means.

13. When your child falls asleep at night. Lay next to him and absorb his sweet baby smell and listen to him breath. This experience will relax you, and will add one of the warmest memories to your collection of motherhood.

14. The Laugh Master Game. Have fun, be a kid, be a little crazy and make them laugh. It's contagious and you will soon all be laughing together. Embrace their laughter, their smiles, their funny faces, and their out of breath flops when they are pooped out from laughing. My little one is pooped out after this and usually falls asleep just after dinner.

Motherhood is a wonderful part of life but requires that we constantly give of ourselves.  Learning to find fun and laughter in the things we do and the ability to laugh when we don't feel like it is a gift worth giving yourself. It makes us all the more better at what we do - for ourselves and our kids.

Senin, 31 Juli 2017

International Perspective About Surrogate Motherhood

Surrogacy is basically whereby a couple comes to an agreement with a different individual woman to become pregnant on behalf of them on terms that she is only a gestational carrier. The reason why people go out to seek the services of surrogate mothers is because they might have health problems which might hinder them from conceiving or because their careers do not allow them to become pregnant etc. The International perspective about surrogate motherhood has come to be accepted in most parts of the world bearing the fact that not every couple can go through the normal pregnancy.

The surrogate may be a relative, a stranger or a friend. For those people who involve their relatives in the surrogacy process, do so because of the high coast of hiring a stranger. Most of the surrogate related businesses have been established in form of agencies such that if you are in need of a surrogate mother you can just go through the net or the weekly advertisements on the local dailies and Walla, the next thing you know, you have yourself surrogate mother. In the United States of America for example, it is estimated that the surrogacy business brings about approximately $30,000 and $60,000 for the mother. The amount eventually adds up to approximately $70,000 to $90,000 for the whole process.

The international perspective about surrogate motherhood has made the coast for the service to range between $15,000 to $30,000+ mostly depending on the country and the agreeing parties. There is also the aspect of gestation surrogacy and traditional surrogacy. Since there are more complications involving medical procedures for gestation surrogacy, the gestation surrogacy tends to be more expensive than the traditional surrogacy. The history concerning the international perspective about surrogate motherhood has been surrounded by much criticism because some people believe that when a surrogate bears a child for another couple to bring up, it is sometimes interpreted as antiquity.

The creation of the legal surrogate idea and the international perspective about surrogate motherhood is highly credited to none other than Attorney Noel Keane. This is despite the fact that the gentleman together with Dr. Warren J. Ringold where highly criticized by politicians and the press. Today it is because of them that international perspective about surrogate motherhood is viewed from a different angle and it is because of these that many couples are able to raise their own babies and lead a normal life like any other average family. Despite the fact that surrogacy is widely accepted all over, it also comes with some complications such as when the surrogate mother refuses to give up the baby to the biological mother that paid her. These come from a 1986 case of baby M, whose surrogate mother refused to cede custody to Melissa Stern the biological mother. Although the court of California eventually awarded custody to Melissa Stern the biological mother, these shows that if there is no clear agreement and documentation between both parties, there is bound to be complications once the baby is born.

Kamis, 13 Juli 2017

Motherhood - To Fear or Not to Fear?

Motherhood is such a big word. But what does it mean? It is the state of being a mother or having the qualities of a good mother. With such definition it would mean bigger responsibilities. You have to think of others than yourself and meet up others needs first more than yours.

To fear it or not? I would say not. Motherhood is meant to be a wonderful moment for women to enjoy. Motherhood entails physical, psychological and emotional readiness to be able to perform your duties well and for it to be enjoyable. Physical readiness because it would mean sleepless nights, hard work and at times multi tasking and not to mention your body should be ready as well. Psychological readiness because you need to know first if you are ready to be a mother considering all there is to do as a mother. Emotional readiness because it is really a roller coaster of emotions from pregnancy till birth and raising up a child. Conflicts may arise as to what you believe in and to what your children wants so this should be well thought of also.

Motherhood is a selfless devotion to others. A gift and privilege from God. Seeing your child for the first time, holding him/her. Witnessing all of their firsts. From their first step, the first words they say, the first food they ate, the first conversation with your child. You will be amazed at how well they reason out. The first time they go to school which by the way parents are more excited than the kids. Oh the joy of motherhood!

For some, accidents happen like teenage pregnancy. In situations like these readiness comes in late. Teen moms are generally reluctant to this new bigger responsibility they have. They think that their lives are over because they have this big burden on their shoulders just when they are still starting to know what life is. We as a society should be supportive to these teens and show them acceptance for them to be able to responsibly rear their children well. It is also because of these situations that we have to educate our teens of sex.


Rabu, 28 Juni 2017

5 Exhaustive Tips on Motherhood

Motherhood is perhaps the most cherished period of a woman's' life. Ever since she is pregnant till when she brings her baby up, she is in the most beautiful stage of life, called motherhood. However beautiful and pure it is, it is certainly hard to sail through this episode of life, without much prior insight into it. These days there are some very good motherhood guides available online. But if you are looking for a short read, which covers pretty much every aspect of this stage, then read on.

    Take good care of yourself during pregnancy, because what you do to yourself, is what you do to your baby at last. It is always better to have the best kind of food, as prescribed; also have a good and comprehensive workout routine which will help you during delivery and also bring about a high metabolism that will help both your baby and you. Food and exercise are the first things you have got to pay attention to.
    Take your doctor's advice seriously. All the pills and also other prescribed foods and drugs need to be taken. Remember this is only to help you cope up with this phase in a better manner.
    Be comfortable. Do not over exert and be overcome by discomfort. Always choose to be in a position that is comfortable and in clothes that are comfortable too. Shop for the best maternity clothes that you can flaunt in this period of life. Be mentally comfortable for delivery as well.
    After pregnancy the most important thing you have got to consider is that of your baby's protection. Of course do not forget yourself in the bargain. Do the best for your baby and yourself and also take great care. You might need some advice during this phase, all you have to do is ask someone who is experienced or just go through some online guide.
    Lastly, enjoy your motherhood. Have fun and make small things look beautiful and charming.

If you are looking for the best way to enjoy and relish motherhood, you have to be extremely comfortable. Indulge in the most comfortable and inexpensive maternity clothes




Selasa, 06 Juni 2017

Motherhood; A Good Long Look

With the kind of hours we have to put in caring, feeding, cooking for, cleaning after, bathing, scolding, worrying about our children, you'd imagine it to be an extremely lucrative career, wouldn't you? One that would not only give you monetary rewards but also emotional satisfaction. A career that will send you off to many exotic countries for free and you'll get to meet many different people from all walks of life because of your career, right?

Erm.....

What is it about motherhood that is so absolutely enthralling? So enchanting, so miraculous that it is almost like a very cruel joke. You love it, you love being mom but heck, you wish the kids will just stop SCREAMING!!!

Look, we said motherhood is amazingly rewarding, but we didn't say in what way. And yes, we did say that motherhood gives you a warm glow on your face (from all that running around, of course) and a joyfully painful ache in your heart (He said he hated me!), what's not to like about being a mother? Well...it depends on how you want to look at it, really.

If you enjoy standing for hours cooking just to have your kids fling it around the dining table lasso-fashion in their own creative way of expressing their appreciation, yes, motherhood is really quite worthwhile. If your hands feel coarser than sandpaper and you LIKE IT THAT WAY, by golly, you're made to be a mother. And if you enjoy tripping over toys on the stairs because you think it's really challenging and exciting, be my guest.

But what is all this hoopla about being a mother? Isn't it like...the most natural thing in the world to be?

Look, motherhood is exclusive. It's exclusive to our own gender because males can NEVER be mom....even if they had a womb implanted, in my personal opinion, motherhood goes beyond having a womb and a vagina...but correct me if I am wrong. Motherhood is a life-changing, life-long, emotional career that can take you places. And a man cannot just fit into it because they just don't have that emotional capacity.

I don't want to explain this because I might end up in a man-bashing session but motherhood is something that I never thought I'd enjoy. Sure, it doesn't pay (at all) and it's sometimes (ALWAYS is more like it) draining and exhausting.

But if you tell me that your heart will swell whenever your boss closes his/her eyes in front of you and you watch your boss breathe in and out and thank the Lord above that you are blessed with an opportunity to work with him/her, then you're weird. Unless, of course, your boss is your child.

Which brings me back to my original intention of writing this article.

If given a chance to choose again, I would STILL continue to be a mom to my boys. No amount of mullah will get me to change my mind. Not even the world. The reason? It's simple.

My boss asks me to write a report for him, I frown, thinks he's such a buffoon but do it anyway because I want my salary at the end of the month.

As compared to...

My kids soil their pants and I have to spend an hour scrubbing human feces off carpets and I am smiling as he stands there, right there in the doorway asking me, "Mom, can I have a lollipop now?" I smile because he looks so sweet and pouty and say "Sure, go ahead but only one, ok?". He grins and runs off with a quick, "Thanks, MOM!". I smile because I give...not get.

In motherhood, that is, sometimes, all there is to it.